....deep breaths.

...Yesterday a friend told me that a young family member of theirs was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes last week.  My eyes welled up with tears....a 4 year old baby.  I took a deep breath, collected my thoughts....and then started trying to think of something, anything to have her tell the parents that would make this devastating news easier.

...I gave her my phone number for them & told her to have them call me.  I scratched a bunch of notes on a piece of paper...a torn piece of envelope...  All the while holding back tears, my chest aching to cry....just to let go & cry....one of those hard cries that don't really help...but somehow make you feel better.  What can "I" tell this family to help...  I told her to tell them it will get easier, it will get easier the more that they educate themselves...  I told her to tell them when it gets to be too much...take a breath, say a prayer, and know that their baby, this situation is in God's hands... I left my friend with a heavy heart...saying a silent prayer in my head for this family...for this child...

I wish that I could take this away from their baby....from my baby....but I can't....Darn IT....I can't...

But...what I can do...    I can pray everyday...I can HOPE for a Cure.  I can assist this family in anyway that I possibly can.  I can tell them little things that helped me out.  I Hope that I can make a difference for them...I Hope that I can somehow make this easier for them...  I HOPE that I can somehow lessen this heaviness in their heart....

I HOPE that God can lessen this heaviness in mine...

I'm Fine....

I do believe that way too much has gone on over the past 7 months to even remotely try to "catch" up....So, we will move forward...We will "keep on, keeping on..."  This is what I do....this is what I am trying to teach my amazing Sunshine girl to do....

Yes, somedays ARE hard...somedays I AM exhausted....but, then there are OTHER days, or for that matter other MOMENTS...  Those are what I live for...those little perfect moments that make all the "hard" times worth it.

Those moments when I look at Sydney...and realize just how amazing she is and how blessed I am to be her mom.  She makes my world go round...  Those mornings when I want to crawl back under the covers and go back to sleep...I don't...because what will that show my Sunshine girl....NOTHING.  I want to show her how to be strong, how to believe in herself always, to be kind & encouraging to others, to always, always, ALWAYS do her best (even on those days when we don't really want to)....





I WANT to be the best mom that I can for my amazing little girl....and every day I will "Keep On...Keeping On"